Would you stick your head up a hippo’s hoop?

A murder of crows…

A parliament of owls…

And a kettle of vultures…the weird and wonderful names for groups of birds.

I can’t help but feel vultures were robbed and it should have been a “murder of vultures”.

Regardless, you can impress everyone the next time you’re watching Planet Earth and the vultures are chomping away on the rotting carcass of a hippo.

Vultures are ridiculously effective waste disposal units and an essential part of the eco-system of the African savanna but they have to play a waiting game.

Because, for all they have massive beaks, they can’t open up the goodies themselves. Which I imagine is a bit frustrating when you’re standing next to an all-you-can-eat buffet but can’t take a bite.

So, when it comes to a hippo, a rhino, or any other massive meal they have a choice -

1. Wait

2. Snack on the eyes, mouth, nose, etc

3. Stick their head right up the hippo’s hoop and eat its ass…literally.

And your clients are a bit like vultures…they can scavenge around their IG account picking up a morsel here and there to cobble together a workout or two but that’s about it.

But few will be prepared to, metaphorically, stick their head up the hippo's ass and trawl the internet to piece together the info that’s out there.

This is why, when it comes to pitching your programme you need to paint a pretty graphic picture of their options.

That they can -

1. Be perpetually frustrated as they live off the scraps and failed dreams.

2. Stick their head up that ass.

3. Take the easy route and buy your programme.

So don’t shy away from telling them the info is out there. But make sure they know how messy working their way through all that shit to get to the good stuff will be.

Then tell them about the easy route that’ll save them time, allow them to skip the frustration of wasted effort, and avoid eating shit by joining your programme.

Now, you do this by pointing out how bleak the other options are.

Say you work with guys struggling with “dad bod” now the kids have arrived.

Point out that they’ll end up wasting time on ineffective diets and unsustainable workouts and still be struggling to keep up with the kids.

How sticking to their current approach will have them looking in the mirror every morning and worrying if their wife finds them attractive.

Or that they’ll have to accept that baggy t-shirts will be their go-to unless something changes.

While your programme is the fast track to that jacked athletic body they crave.

One that’ll blend seamlessly into their life so they can get on with enjoying time with their family.

And let them reclaim that fit, confident younger version they see fading into the distance.

Show them how dark it is going on their own and shine a light on the future version of themselves.

Do that and watch your conversion rates skyrocket.

Later

Colin